Some funny Lew Cady’isms

We'll miss Lew By Forrest Whitman Gilpin County will miss Lew Cady. Leslie (his wife) and his family will miss him most of all. There will be plenty of reminiscences in these pages, and those close to him will deal with his passing partly by reminiscing I'm sure. We'll miss his publication Little Kingdom Come. Everyone got a laugh out of that paper. And, yes, most everyone opened his publication to the Gunslinger nudes in his centerfold first. It's hard to add much to what will be written about Lew. That's why I've been thinking about the funny things Lew used to say. That could add a bit to the Cady legend. How to advertise in Rollinsville Lew worked in the advertising business most of his life and had an eye for ads. He used to kid me about ads for real estate in Rollinsville and north Gilpin. He'd say that “stunning view of the back range” really meant “You'll never get there in winter.” He claimed that “amenities” advertised meant, “Only twenty feet to the outhouse.” As he said, amenities out north classically meant “running cold water.” He loved what he called “the pointylands,” but he never stopped making fun of things around here. He especially got a chuckle out of what “located on a County Road” didn't mean. As he said, “That usually doesn't mean you get snow plowed out unless the head of road and bridge lives there.” I tried to argue that point with Lew, pointing out that not all county roads had ever been adopted by the county. “Neither have all the red headed kids in Central City either,” was his response. Lew goes to the Opera No one loved opera more than Lew. He'd somehow manage to bag some tiny part in most of them. A couple of times he even got to say a line. He told one on himself about a Shakespearean piece (apocryphal I'm sure). His line was, “Hark, the cannon!” after the bass drum would sound. He rehearsed his one line over and over. But, when the time came he faltered. The drum sounded and Lew stammered, “What the hell was that!” This probably was not true, but it made a good story. Another one he told was about the final scene of one piece where the soprano jumps over the parapet and falls to her death. The soprano in question weighed in excess of 250. She was afraid she might sprain her ankle. So, Lew and the stage hands borrowed a trampoline strategically placed so she could ease on down. During dress rehearsal she went over. Though dead, she bounced back up! He loved to tell that one. Lew comments on politics Lew liked Gilpin best back in the days before gaming came on. He refused to say the word “gaming” and always said “gambling.” In fact, he never fully recovered from that onset. One time I argued with him, probably up in the Elk's Club bar, about the benefits we'd received. I pointed out that that line of guys who used to sit on the front porch of the Stage Stop and gossip, were now carpooling down Hwy 119 to work at casino jobs. “Right,” said Lew, “and now they’ll all get a DUI arrest after their last shift drink.” I once wrote in this column about some new casino going up. I'd been impressed by the architecture. Lew lambasted me for having really poor taste in buildings. I told him I'd have to take an architecture class online. He allowed as how I was too ancient to get much past the Parthenon before I'd be too old to read. We settled that one over a beer at the Elks Club. The Elks, Dostal Alley, and maybe the Gold Coin, were his last redoubts. Those were the three places that reminded him of old time Central City and he loved them. Lew loved beer Lew was really sure that beer was evidence that God loves us and wants us to be happy. He especially liked the brews Buddy put out in Dostal Alley, but he liked a good brew up and down the street. I once asked him if it was true that he'd had a beer in every bar on Colfax down in Denver in one day. “True enough,” said Lew, “but a couple new ones had opened before I got to the end.” He was never a guy who liked change, especially in beers. He once insisted that the new popularity of Mexican beer was a government plot to get us all to learn Spanish. He loved baseball too Lew was one of those few people who could stick with the Rockies until the bitter end. Once he sat through a long rainy day in late September. The Rockies were something like a zillion games out of first place. The game meant nothing at all. No brilliant plays had happened. He was probably one of 15 fans left at the last out. “I'm getting ready for next year.” was all he said. Not only that, Lew knew everything about the game. He claimed to have twice seen the hidden ball play. That's the one where the pitcher fakes an expected and routine throw to first base, but palms the ball. Then he produces the ball and wraps up a couple of other outs. Lew commented that that's exactly how life happens to us. Have we lost our sense of humor? Lew's little paper constantly made fun of things around Gilpin County. He made fun of the commissioners, with yours truly included back in the day. He made fun of the Central City council mercilessly. He made fun of the gaming industry. I don't know anything outside his limits. But, he never made fun of individuals past a certain point. I'm pretty sure his aim was to help us all take ourselves a little less seriously. There are many things in our public life that deserve to be “sent up” as Lew would say. Some of them are pretty tragic. Think of the U.S. Congress. The members of that body seemingly would risk our fair republic any day of the week rather than lose a political point. That's pretty sad. They need someone like Lew to make them laugh at themselves. John Stewart on television comes pretty close to Lew's sense of humor. Maybe he'll get more popular. We need more like him. Did Lew leave a legacy? Legacies are always tricky things to discuss. Lew was a great favorite at the Central City Press Club's annual meeting and especially at the Denver Press Club. The Denver Press Club will outlive him. I guess it's possible someone will try and publish the Little Kingdom Come, though that's really doubtful. Of course, some of us will tell his jokes for a long time. Maybe a good laugh is the very best legacy.

Patrick Henry Sweeney

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